Just a regular fruit loop

kerrbear61 @ 2007-09-11T13:28:00

2007-09-11T12:43:05Z

My 12_stories table:

TABLE EIGHT - MISCELLANEOUS B

01.	Anger.	02.	Choices.	03.	Answers.	04.	Thought.
05.	Desire.	06.	Travel.	07.	Assignment.	08.	Leaving.
09.	Caring.	10.	Duty.	11.	People.	12.	Loss.

00/12

Pairings are:
Due South-Ray K/Fraser, Ray V/Fraser, Ray V/Stella, Diefenbaker
Battlestar Galactica-Leoben/Starbuck, Six/Gaius Baltar
NCIS-Abby/Tony, Tony/Gibbs
Hard Core Logo-Joe/Billy
Wilby Wonderful-Duck/Buddy, Duck/Dan
Twitch City-Curtis/Newbie

Yay, eep, busy and freaked

2007-06-01T19:24:32Z

Yay stuff:
I finally have a new wireless thingy which works without having to play twister, which I've been doing for the last few weeks.
I'm actually using this blog for a proper 'Hows My Life Going' blog. *hears the gasps of shock from the audience*
There's a place where the guys all dress like Duck. Bad thing is none of them come even close to Callum's pretty. *sigh* I live in hope
Oh and go me *paul gross arms*

Eep stuff:
Well I've been tagged for stop drop porn and my porn is completely broken. Seriously, I've written everything except the porn :O ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
I got an e-mail telling me that there are more tickets on sale for Glastonbury and I actually cried. I have no idea why, I think I've lost it completely.

I'm going to be so damn busy the rest of this month. On Friday I have to travel to Plymouth to have a hearing test (and I'm terrified, the place is right opposite where I had my braces when I was younger-bad memories), traveling the 300 miles back the next day. Saturday after that moving house, then that Wednesday hopefully off to Glastonbury!! Yay Bjork, The Who, my favorite comediennes, shirley Bassey and the Youth Orchestra all in one place, how can you not love it!
Hmm, the Slashy chat night may be pushed back to July, I guess that will be the same month we zetaboard upgrade. haha that will freak a fair few people out i imagine, I can't tell you how different it is.

Oh and the freaky thing:
Tori Spelling on Johnathan Ross' show tonight.

added: how funny is that mood picture thing? *cackles at it* I've scared the ferret!

1character challenge

2006-11-22T18:41:33Z

My completed (just on time!) 1character challenge.

Title: A Mountie, Two Rays and A Wolf
Fandom: Due South
Character: Benton Fraser
Theme set: Eta
Disclaimer: Due South belongs to the alliance which includes all characters, so none belong to me. No copyright infringement is meant.
Rating: NC-17

#01 - Fair Play: Fraser always had a strong sense of fair play, but now overwhelmingly so.
#02 - Bones: Dief was happily eating his bone, making a mess over the consulate floor, much to Fraser's despair.
#03 - Desire: The desire rushed straight through Ray as he watched the naked Mountie stroke his cock.
#04 - Flower: Ben watched Ray play with the daisy he had been given, something was clearly troubling the blond detective.
#05 - Hat Box: Ray fell over a hat box and fell onto Fraser sending them both skidding across the floor.
#06 - Jump: Fraser jumped from building to building trying to track down his man.
#07 - Mother: Ray Vecchio's mother had taken to Benton straight away.
#08 - Father: "I am Benton Fraser of the royal Canadian mounted police, I first came to Chicago on the trail of my fathers killers; Ray why haven't you stopped me?"
#09 - Saliva: Fraser licked the table leg, and Ray screwed up his nose at him.
#10 - Kaleidoscope: A kaleidoscope of colours burst in front of Ben's eyes as he came powerfully before darkness overcame him.
#11 - Primary Colors: Ray stroked over Ben's uniform, he decided he definitely preferred the red uniform over the brown.
#12 - Ideal: Fraser couldn't believe his luck, his ideal man was draped over him, snuggling closer into his chest.
#13 - Challenge: It was a challenge to get Ben to just give up control and be fully open with Ray but it was worth it.
#14 - Scar: Ray payed special attention to Fraser's scar where he had been shot by the other Ray.
#15 - Face: Ben felt Ray's long fingers trace his face, almost as if he was trying to ease and erase all the cuts and bruises.
#16 - Unzipped: Ray watched greedily as Ben unzipped his trousers, slowly and teasingly.
#17 - Comfort: He hated to admit it to Ray but the soft, comfortable beds were something Fraser dreamed about when he was sleeping on the hard floor or the bumpy ground.
#18 - Homeland: He was back in Canada, Fraser felt finally like he was home.
#19 - Window: Each little raindrop ran down Fraser's window, his eyes tracking them until they were out of sight, deep in thought.
#20 - Try: Fraser didn't just try to do his best, he always carried out everything to perfection.
#21 - Black Cloud: A fierce storm was brewing judging by the dark black clouds that Fraser could see ahead.
#22 - Call: Ray felt horrible not being able to tell the truth to Benny over that phone call.
#23 - Design: The beautiful, clear design was extremely appreciated by Fraser.
#24 - Concentrate: It was hard to concentrate with a sexy Mountie breathing over your neck.
#25 - Bite: Ben rubbed ointment in the bite marks Ray had enthusiastically given him last night.
#26 - Power: The powerful thrusts became quicker and even stronger as Fraser came.
#27 - Fingers: Ben's fingers probed ever deeper into Ray's willing body, the tight heat surrounding his fingers and making his cock jolt with want.
#28 - Damage: Fraser gave a long detailed explanation of his chase to justify how much damage he had caused.
#29 - Glue: Fraser had managed to get the glue exactly where he wanted it, Ray on the other hand was less successful and know had it in his hair.
#30 - Natural: Ben smelt natural, like bonfires and wood and it aroused Ray beyond belief.
#31 - Respite: There was no respite from the biting cold and howling gales attacking Ray and Fraser.
#32 - Disaster: Ray's placed had been ransacked, it looked like a disaster area and Fraser couldn't help but feel a bit responsible.
#33 - Accuse: Ray glared at his accusers, he couldn't believe that he'd let Fraser talk him into talking with these guys.
#34 - Morning: The light irritated his eyes as he slowly woke up to the sight of Ray Kowalski cuddling even closer to his body.
#35 - Haunted: The haunted look in his eyes cut though the night sky, the trauma he had gone though so worryingly clear for just one moment.
#36 - Wrong: How could something be wrong if it made Ben feel happier than he could ever remember?
#37 - Note: It was just a short simple note, but it proved Fraser cared.
#38 - Go: Fraser's get up and go seemed to have got up and went.
#39 - Upside Down: Ray was upside down again, he hadn't even been anything but the right way up until he met Fraser.
#40 - Keep Out: He should of seen that keep out sign
#41 - Sides: Fraser made good use of Ray's ticklish sides, making Ray jump and wake instantly.
#42 - Separation: Fraser ached for Ray, he couldn't cope with the separation from him for this long.
#43 - Trail: Fraser was hot on the trail of Muldoon, it was something he had thought about many times before and now he was finding completion.
#44 - Liar: One of the men called Fraser a liar in the vain hope that he could be let off, but only got stony silence from the cops.
#45 - Hour: The clock ticked closer to the hour and the phone had not rang yet, a worry crept into her mind that the cop and the Mountie had failed.
#46 - Easy: Nothing about Fraser was easy, but everything about Fraser was worth it.
#47 - Tie: Fraser grabs Ray's tie and ties Ray's hands behind his back, enjoying the power more than he thought.
#48 - Sense: Fraser could sense something was wrong with Francesca but couldn't work out what exactly was upsetting her.
#49 - Education: Benton was extremely anxious to educate Ray in the ways of the Canadian wilderness.
#50 - Change: Everything had to change, he had to move on no matter what he left behind, his father had taught him that much.

My 10 Inspirations

2006-08-15T15:52:10Z

I don't have a table for this one, so its just a list of prompts. This one's my 10_inspirations challenge. My claim is Jeremy Clarkson from Top Gear. (sorry to my wubblys who don't like stories with him in really but it just screamed out for Jez)

1. Different shapes and sizes
2. Balance of power
3. Diamond in the rough
4. Take a back seat
5. pleonasm: the use of more words than are necessary to express an idea
6. I dream of a love that even time will lie down and be still for. -Sally, Practical Magic
7. Nobody drinks alone. Every demon, every ghost from your past and every memory you've held back follows you home -- Keith Urban : Nobody Drinks Alone
8. Crumpled bits of paper filled with imperfect thought -- Mike and the Mechanics : The Living Years
9. As she sunk into the corner, her heart shattered into a million pieces.
10. He felt a soft hand caress his neck as the warm air of a whispered word ghosted across his ear.

1 Fandom sentences

2006-08-13T19:38:39Z

I'm doing a challenge for 1fandom which is to write 50 sentences for one fandom. I chose Top Gear RPS.

sixth set
01. Move	Jeremy hates moving in the morning, the muscles protesting and bones clicking, true hell.
02. Sleep	Richard feels so tired, just wanting to sleep for a thousand years, maybe he‘ll wake up a true princess.
03. Inspire	James is Jeremy’s inspiration in life, his grace and angelic beauty never ceasing to take Jeremy’s breath away.
04. Sweat	Richard wake up in a cold sweat, the nightmare making his body run a fever.
05. Lovely	Jeremy wonders if he realises how lovely he is, he senses that he doesn‘t truly know.
06. Breathe	The feeling of the heavy weight on top of Richard makes him feel safe and warm until he realises he can’t breathe, “Jeremy!”
07. Rough	James thrusts get faster and rougher bringing a screaming Richard to orgasm.
08. Strike	James hits his third strike of the night, much to the clear annoyance of James and Richard.
09. Help	Jeremy can’t bring himself to ask for the help he desperately needs, the shame would be too great for him.
10. Resist	Jeremy’s last cohesive thought is wondering why they had resisted so long before his body gives over to the exquisite pleasure.
11. Meet	The mobile phone beeped as the text message came through, teasingly short. ‘Meet me tonight at our place.’
12. Taut	His young lover eased his tense and taut muscles in his back, the sigh escaping from his mouth echoing through the room.
13. Thirst	All four of them entwined in there large bed were sleeping soundly.
14. All	Richard strained to hear the powering v8 race though the fog, his Stig setting a new lap time in the Porsche.
15. Fog	The Stig wondered what had happened to Jeremy and James; they had seemed so close before James broke up with his girlfriend.
16. Before	The pain was almost unbearable, Jeremy’s two younger lovers being too energetic for his back.
17. Hurt	Richard couldn’t explain him to anyone, kind was the nearest thing he could get to how James was; it seemed like he was stating the obvious.
18. Kind	Ahh, these are the times to live for, James May pouring wine over your naked chest then lapping it up with a warm tongue.
19. Warm	James couldn’t work out the pattern; the Telegraph crossword was getting harder he was sure of that.
20. Pattern	James couldn’t work out the pattern; the Telegraph crossword was getting harder he was sure of that.
21. Cycle	Jeremy could see that he was going to go straight into the branch; he really should have got those brakes checked on his bicycle before he used it.
22. Glow	They bathed in the relaxed after glow of there love making.
23. Zero	Yet another newspaper headline, ‘Clarkson-Zero or Hero?’
24. Wonder	Jeremy didn’t know if it was good or worrying that Richard stated at his cock with such wonder.
25. Scold	James licked the scolded Stig’s fingers, trying to ease the burning pain.
26. Figure	A lonely figure was lurking in the shadows, disgusted at himself for being so turned on with what he had just seen.
27. Then	Then it all went blank for him, falling into whirring whiteness.
28. Lie	James never lied to Richard, he just couldn’t; Jeremy on the other hand was a different story.
29. Hunt	While Jeremy was shouting some right-wing, pro-hunt speech at anyone willing to listen, The Stig kept an eerie silence.
30. Mistake	It was all an awful case of mistaken identity which made Jeremy plead with Richard desperately.
31. Birth	The birth of Top Gear Dog’s puppies made Richard cry embarrassingly into James’s shoulder.
32. Cut	The Stig licked at Richard cut gently, somehow healing the wound.
33. Double	James gulped down the fourth double scotch of the night, loving the feel of the strong alcohol burning its path down his throat.
34. Cover	Jeremy wasn’t sure he wanted to know what was going on underneath the covers at the other end of the Shamal XL.
35. Lick	The small lapping licks on his painfully hard cock set Richard off, he bucked and groaned as James sucked and licked.
36. Wheel	They were all at a loss to explain how the wheel had come off the Kia.
37. Slight	Richard’s body was so slight and tiny compared to his much bigger partner.
38. Fling	He knew it was more than a fling to James, but he had less to lose, he couldn’t do it to his family.
39. Sorry	“I’m sorry I shouted at you James,” Richard apologies while getting onto his knees to try and make it up to him.
40. Call	He was always waiting for that phone call, the one that ended up never coming.
41. Jewel	He might not have been conventionally good looking, but to James he was a thousand times more beautiful than any jewel.
42. Fruit	Richard whirled his tongue around the strawberry, licking his lips when some of the juice escaped as his drooling lovers looked on hungrily.
43. House	Jeremy’s Isle Of Man house was the bet place for the three of them to get complete privacy.
44. Swim	Richard couldn’t believe it, how can a man get to the age of 46 without learning how to swim.
45. Family	Who needed a family when you had Jeremy and Richard’s children running under your feet trying to catch Pablo and Top Gear Dog?
46. Interest	Top Gear Dog paid particular interest to Fusker’s paws, making sure they were well sniffed before liking the mad cat’s nose.
47. Record	They lay on there back panting for breath until James looked up and saw the red light on the camera, “Hey, is this thing recording?”
48. Glass	The glass shattered to the fall, splintering like his broken heart.
49. Shape	“You need to eat more than Shape yoghurt Richard, food won’t dent your teeth whitening I’m sure.”
50. Live	He just wanted to live freely, do whatever he wanted, not be constrained by rules or gates; but now he was penned in like a caged animal.

My 2x5Obsessions challenge table

2006-08-10T22:36:16Z

My 2x5obsessions tables

2x5obsessions Because everyone is a fan...
Author: kerrbear61
Fandom: Due South
Claim: Fraser/Ray K

1. silence in black and white

2. northern lights

3. blowing in the wind

4. a bond with darkness

5. the toll of a bell at sunrise

Progress: 0/5

2x5obsessions Because everyone is a fan...
Author: kerrbear61
Fandom: Diagnosis Murder
Claim: Jesse/Steve

1. reversed roles

2. how you remind me of the unknown

3. oasis

4. incredible youth

5. envy

Progress: 0/5

WTF 27 challenge Table

2006-08-10T22:15:49Z

My wtf27 challenge! There's no claiming for this one, but unless I get stuck I'm going for The Rasmus :)

001.	Genderswap.	002.	Transformation (animals).	003.	Transformation (inanimate).
004.	Wings.	005.	Tentacles!	006.	Mpreg.
007.	High School AU.	008.	Apocaylpse Now.	009.	Supernatural (creatures).
010.	Supernatural (powers).	011.	Fantasy AU (traditional).	012.	Fantasy AU (urban).
013.	Fuck or Die.	014.	Pornstars.	015.	Hookers.
016.	You see, I woke up gay.	017.	Trading Places.	018.	Forced Union.
019.	Timeshift.	020.	Aliens.	021.	Doppelganger.
022.	Twins/Non-Canon Siblings.	023.	Out Of Time.	024.	Slaves.
025.	Media Crossover.	026.	Spies and Agents.	027.	OMG we forgot ____.

10 Hurt_Comfort Challenge Table

2006-08-10T12:42:30Z

My new 10_hurt_comfort Challenge. My claim is Richard Hammond from Top Gear. (Abi will be happy with me ;) )

1. Injured	2. Love	3. Sick	4. Drunk	5. Emotion
6. Lonely	7. Jealousy	8. Tears	9. Fear	10. Fight
0/10

Damn heat

2006-07-02T23:03:40Z

OK, it's official, I am now melting into the computer chair. It's seriously too hot. It makes me feel tierd too so I can barely see the screen *grr* and its making me all snappy too. This would be a really bad time for someone to play up-they wouldn't even get to feel the door smack there ass ofn the way out I'd do it so quickly
I don't half whine a lot don't I? *giggles* Meh, my journal, so I'm allowed to bitch :P
On the plus side Slashy's going great guns, biggest test will be when we all bugger off for a holiday. I remember when we went on the UK tour-I think I saw hay bales rolling accross the screen! It was mighty pretty but not something that filed me with joy. When Tina goes to Tammerfest (and if I don't go with her) I'll be looking after the baby by myself for a bit as well as loads of other places. So if I fall off the side of the earth that's where I'll be.

How well do you know me?

2006-07-01T13:01:25Z

Wow, I'm actually using this place to do something non-writing. Tis a shocker isn't it *giggles*
Just copy and paste the questions.

My name:

Who is the love of my life:

Where did we meet:

Take a stab at my middle name:

How long have you known me:

When is the last time that we saw each other:

Do I smoke:

Do I drink:

What was your first impression of upon meeting me/seeing me:

What's one of my favorite things to do:

Am I funny:

What's my favorite type of music:

What is the best feature about me:

Am I shy or outgoing:

Am I a rebel or do I follow the rules:

Do I have any special talents:

Would you call me preppy, average, sporty, punk, hippie, glam, nerdy, snobby, or something else (what):

Have you ever hugged me:

What is my favorite food:

Have you ever had a crush on me:

If there was one good nickname for me, what would it be:

What's your favorite memory of me:

Who do I like right now:

What is my worst habit:

If you and I were stranded on a desert island, what is the one thing I would bring?

Are we friends:

Do you want us to be more than friends?

Will you repost this so I can do it for you?

My 7 Sins table

2006-06-25T13:09:58Z

All about James May from Top Gear

1.	Greed	2.	Gluttony	3.	Wrath
4.	Sloth	5.	Envy	6.	Lust
		7.	Pride

1. Aviators (6-Lust)
2. Envy (5-Envy)
3. Apology (7-Pride)
4. Heartbroken (3-Wrath)
5. Lazy Weekend (4-Sloth)
6. Bet (1-Greed)
7. Addiction (2-Gluttony)

My 7 Virtues table

2006-06-25T13:09:20Z

I've choosen James May from Top Gear for this one

1.	Humility.	2.	Kindness.	3.	Abstinence.
4.	Chastity.	5.	Patience.	6.	Liberality.
		7.	Diligence.

Coming Soon

69smut table

2006-05-22T23:18:05Z

My claim for this Smut_69 challenge is Pauli Rantasalmi ;-)

1.	Moan	2.	Writhe	3.	Satin	4.	Lube	5.	Ring
6.	Restraints	7.	Feather	8.	Leather	9.	Massage	10.	Candle Wax
11.	Ice	12.	Oil	13.	Thrust	14.	Breast	15.	Throat
16.	Taut	17.	Supple	18.	Strained	19.	Whisper	20.	Lick
21.	Kiss	22.	Blindfold	23.	Handcuffs	24.	"Toys"	25.	Orgy
26.	Corset	27.	Scent	28.	Dominant	29.	Submissive	30.	Kinky
31.	Erection	32.	Champagne	33.	Cuddle	34.	Foreplay	35.	Intercourse
36.	Afterglow	37.	Cherries	38.	Fingers	39.	Suckle	40.	Virgins
41.	Sluts	42.	Relationships	43.	Talking Dirty	44.	Sweet Nothings	45.	Proposition
46.	Bottom	47.	Top	48.	Cunning	49.	Heart	50.	Heated
51.	Lips	52.	Role Play	53.	Threesome	54.	Self-Love	55.	Voyeur
56.	Cyber	57.	Phone Encounter	58.	Strangers	59.	Best Friends	60.	Enemies
61.	Slick	62.	Wet	63.	Deep	64.	Dirty	65.	Bad
66.	Wrong	67.	Writer's Choice(Piercing)	68.	Writer's Choice(Corruption)	69.	Writer's Choice

My fics I've done in order:
1. I Spy (055-Voyeur)
2. A dream (014-Breast)
3. Drunk (016-Taut)
4. Shopping (026-Corset)
5. Beauty (044-Sweet Nothings)
6. Beat The Clock (054-Self-Love)
7. Injury (009-Massage)
8. Kisses (021-Kiss)
9. Heat (050-Heated)
10. What Made Him? (049-Heart)
11. Throat (015-Throat)

Interests

2006-05-01T15:44:06Z

LJ Interests meme results

bjork:
She rocks, it's been ages since I last listened to her. Been negleting a tiny bit
drums:
this should be drummers really
finland:
But of course, best place in the world and still haven't been
him:
I've gone off them a bit now, they used to be my favourite band
jackass:
I love Jackass, such a shame they don't do it anymore. Oh well theres always Wildboyz
killer:
Not together but he voice is just wow. And Naughty Boy makes me smile
lauki:
Well... duh. Lauri and Aki together in slashy situations? This is what I live for!
m/m/m:
What's better than two blokes together, yes that's right three!
pauli:
I want his hair. Jayne can go grope the rest of him but I want hair. Close up he looks a lot better than on pictures
suomi rock:
All my favourite bands are finnish it seems now. Lucy Was Driving, Clark Kent, The Rasmus, Flylow, Script Of Flood, the list goes on. How do they do it?

Enter your LJ user name, and 10 interests will be selected from your interest list.

I'm Sure Of It

2005-12-06T01:17:32Z

Rating: G
Paring: OMC/OMC
Warnings: ANC
Genre: Weird fic, drabble.

I look into his sparkling green eyes. One day he’ll meet my gaze across the darkened venue; his sparkling gaze instantly will be attracted to mine. When our eyes meet, I know he’ll fall in love with me, lose the girlfriend, and be mine. He cannot be straight, well not when he meets me anyway. I can turn him. I can make him mine. He’d do anything to be with me. I’ve heard about his touring and that he’s never home, but surely it’s not that bad, he’d find time to be with me. I will be the most important part of his life. I don’t think he could cope without ever having me in his life. I imagine that we will have the perfect family and the perfect life. We will never argue.
This will all happen, I’m sure of it. I just need to meet my green-eyed poster boy.

kerrbear61 @ 2005-11-01T15:24:00

2005-11-01T15:27:17Z

kerrbear61 @ 2005-11-01T15:22:00

2005-11-01T15:22:22Z

kerrbear61 @ 2005-10-04T14:49:00

2005-10-04T13:50:14Z

What are your gothic icons?? by rayofsunshine72
Your name
Your suicide icon
Your sophisticated icon
Your ultimate emo icon
Your dark creature icon
Your kinky icon
Your just plain bizarre icon

Quiz created with MemeGen!

kerrbear61 @ 2005-10-04T14:46:00

2005-10-04T13:46:32Z

ICONS ICONS ICONS Color Quiz (RAINBOW AND BEAUTIFUL) by x0_summer
Name/NickName
Fav Color!
Pink
Red
Orange
Yellow
Green
Blue
Purple
Rainbow
Black/White

Quiz created with MemeGen!

kerrbear61 @ 2005-10-04T14:46:00

2005-10-04T13:46:06Z

ICONS ICONS ICONS Color Quiz (RAINBOW AND BEAUTIFUL) by x0_summer
Name/NickName
Fav Color!
Pink
Red
Orange
Yellow
Green
Blue
Purple
Rainbow
Black/White

Quiz created with MemeGen!

kerrbear61 @ 2005-10-04T14:42:00

2005-10-04T13:42:25Z

What are your gothic icons?? by rayofsunshine72
Your name
Your suicide icon
Your sophisticated icon
Your ultimate emo icon
Your dark creature icon
Your kinky icon
Your just plain bizarre icon

Quiz created with MemeGen!

kerrbear61 @ 2005-06-29T14:44:00

2005-06-29T13:44:10Z

KATHERINE
K	is for	Kinky
A	is for	Adventurous
T	is for	Temperamental
H	is for	Hardworking
E	is for	Emotional
R	is for	Revolutionary
I	is for	Innocent
N	is for	Normal
E	is for	Enchanting

What Does Your Name Mean?

kerrbear61 @ 2005-06-29T14:38:00

2005-06-29T13:38:49Z

You Know You're From Britain When...

You believe that Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday are all good nights for drinking. Sunday day is also entirely reasonable.

You're always a half an hour late to work ... no-one notices or cares.

Coming to work with a hangover is entirely accepted and indeed expected at least once a week.

You can actually give directions to some of those annoying tourists in Oxford Street!

You step over a drunk in the tube station rather than offering to help them.

You don't even bother looking out of the window when you get up in the morning to check what the day is like. You know it is overcast.

You consider a suit to be normal attire for the pub.

You expect men to actually cut, comb and style their hair (using hair products). And to wear decent clothes.

You dissolve in laughter when listening to the funny accent of the Aussie international telephone operator (or on TV!).

You think £40 for a haircut is quite reasonable.

You can't remember what 'customer service' means.

After a big night out you find yourself looking for a Curry house

More than three hours sunlight on summer days seems excessive.

You don't think twice about tipping your hairdresser

You finish every sentence with 'Cheers' or 'Yeah'.

You only just realise you have lost your sunnies, you left them in Greece 2 summers ago.

You like English cuisine. I mean, it's hard to beat a full English breakfast.

You are on to your 6th umbrella and your second overcoat... this year

You've bought a disposable baby BBQ from Tesco.

A day at the beach means wearing the warmest clothes you own while standing on golf ball-size pebbles and the thought of swimming doesn't even enter your head.

You always call soccer football and you have a team and it's not Manchester United.

You don't think twice about buying a packaged sandwich.

A sunny lunchtime means searching for a patch of grass and stripping off practically down to your underwear

You've accepted queuing as a way of life.

You believe that every American is a fatass addicted to hamburgers and hotdogs.

You despise the French (but then, who doesn't?).

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Britan.

Get Your Own "You Know You're From" Meme Here

More cool things for your blog at
Blogthings

kerrbear61 @ 2005-06-29T14:33:00

2005-06-29T13:33:10Z

You Know You're British When....

Be very proud to be British because...

Only in Britain... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

Only in Britain... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to
the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in Britain... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a DIET coke.

Only in Britain... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to
the counters.

Only in Britain... do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.

Only in Britain... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then
have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to
talk to in the first place.

Only in Britain... are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink.

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kerrbear61 @ 2005-06-29T14:26:00

2005-06-29T13:26:39Z

You Know You're Addicted to Smoking When...

You put scotch tape on a broken one.

You only smoke half of the cigarette so you can start on the next one sooner.

A big white truck with the picture of a camel rolls up to your house twice a week with your supply of smokes.

You are considering changing your name to Malboro.

You smoke in the shower.

You've convinced yourself that second-hand smoke is not harmful if you inhale really really deeply.

Your children are named: Winston, Philip Morris and Misty.

R.J. Reynolds sends you a Christmas card.

You're waiting for the last few pews to become a designated smoking area before you'll go back to church.

People invite you outside to admire the stars, and it's daytime.

Every time you light up a cigarette your family stops, drops and rolls.

Your family's Christmas wish list consists of gas masks, fire extinguishers and air fresheners.

You have an environmental awareness group protesting on your lawn.

Your family goes to Los Angeles for fresh air.

Your friends have named their secondhand smoke related coughs after me.

Your cat has taken to wearing "The Patch"

Your family uses fog horns to navigate around you.

Just watching the 400 metre race during the Olympics makes you tired.

The local iron lung dealer sends you their product brochures.

Phillip Morris sends you their annual report and thanks you for your help.

You recently read somewhere that your former cigarette manufacturer went out of business shortly after you switched to a new brand.

Your doctor [excitedly] asks for your permission to use your lung x-rays at his next "Quit Smoking" seminar.

You take baths because the shower puts 'em out

Your nickname at work is "Breakroom."

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends who are addicted to Smoking.

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